Thursday, March 4, 2010

Movie/life review

The other day I watched a movie and it made me think a lot. It is amazing how so many things I do, or see, or hear affect me so differently now. I don't know if it because now I am a mom, or if it's because of all we have been through with any rate, things look much different to me now.

So what was the movie? It was My Sister's Keeper. I know, one of those sad movies about a child that is ill. I have always been touched by movies like that, but now it is much more than that. There were so many lines in the movie that really hit much I could resonate with, so much that made me see more of myself and who I have become.

One of the first lines was Having a child who is sick is a full-time occupation. That is no joke. I know Kylie is miles ahead of where she was last year, but that doesn't mean it wasn't the most difficult time of my life. You can't forget where you have been, but maybe now we can try and use it as a reference to where we currently are and where we will be. But yeah, it was definitely a full-time job and more. When you can't leave your child for a second, and have to monitor them and be there for comfort, and waiting for the next seizure to record it, cry through it, and pray that everything will be okay...yeah, that is exhausting for sure.

The next was, At any moment the whole world could come crashing down. One of the big differences with IS and other illnesses that children can get is that there is no picture of what is yet to come, and what your child will go through, and where they will likely end up. So yeah, it can all change so quickly, and you have no idea what to expect...I think that is what makes it so tough.

It's hard to imagine a time before everything happened. When we were in the middle of it all, it was definitely hard to picture what our days were like before the bi-weekly doctor apptmts, the daily steroid injections, the recording of the seizures, watching and waiting for anything that looked suspicious. I have to admit that since things have gone so well for Kylie....I mean she has done so great and come so far from where she could be...that there are times we don't see what once was, but what we have now...not always easy, but going forward is all we can really do.

The daughter that was ill in the movie was looking through a scrapbook she created. When she got to a page of pictures of her mother and father, she had this thought for her father I took your first love from you, I only hope that one day you get her back. Wow, was that a powerful thought. I know I am not the same I was before Kylie, and definitely not who I was before everything happened. I only hope that one day I will not only come back, but be a better version of me...soon would be nice.

Lastly, we all know having a child changes your life...forever, but nothing like when you have a child with special needs, needs you don't yet realize because you are still learning...still going through the motions and onto the next step...rinse, repeat.

Okay, so one more thing. Alec Baldwin plays an attorney in the movie, and in his first appearance he notes that he has a service dog. It wasn't quite clear until the end part of the movie what the service dog was for. He apparently is an's that for irony.

1 comment:

Sophie's Story by Elaine said...

I saw that movie too. It's a heartbreaker.


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